I went to check my email this morning and found the most recent blog post from Kate Gabrielle, AKA Scathingly Brilliant - oh boy, love her! Her love of animals, her way of dressing, the style of films she prefers, her room! - the aunt she introduced to us that we all fell in love with!
She's going to stop blogging.
Ok, it's not like she's vanishing off the face of the earth! She wants to concentrate on her artwork (she has an etsy shop) & move on to other endeavors.
Good for her!
Grrr for me! An already upset and queasy morning tummy has turned completely sour ... as has my morning, where I'm trying (perhaps desperately!) to hold on to good things, despite realities in my face --
The last time I felt this in the pit of my stomach about a blogger leaving was when Young House Love decided to stop. Sure, sure - they now have two small children, and many other successful endeavors to pursue --
-- and at the same time it felt -- abrupt. It felt like -- gee, I thought we were friends?! - and now I'm sitting here thinking things to myself like -- (a) dammit to hell, have I done the Jeannee thing where I think someone is my friend, but they're really not?! (b) far darker thoughts -- were you really using and relying on this friendship so that you could do that odious thing there is now - 'building your brand' - and then, when I was no longer needed -- ?!!!????
It makes me slightly gunshy about following and loving other bloggers -- something I know I've experienced with making online friends into "real friends": the fallout at times has been literally overwhelming and life-altering, and not in a positive sense ;- Whenever that has happened to me (and I've been online since 1996, so it's happened a few times!), I have to sit down and remind myself - name the names - of people I've met online who haven't been that way: who have become true friends!!!
And I suppose I should do the same about people's blogs and vlogs I follow that fall in that category - certainly, I Love Purple!, who is a frequent commentator on this blog, is one of those persons :)
& yet ... & yet ... I'm afraid of the jinx factor. I'm afraid that - should I do so - they'll just go away, too. Like the daily vlogger from the New England states who created visual masterpieces to music... and who left after a life-changing event of her own (which is a common thread, I've noticed) ... Or another daily vlogger who still vlogs, but just not as often, because she's married a real dog and she doesn't want to show that side of him, so she doesn't record when he's in full bad-dog mode - which is stinking, lousy sad!
I know, I know : pray for them, pray for all of us....
And I shall, certainly ... but I have to get there first ....
... and right now, I'm just the girl with the sour stomach & sad soul.