No, no buried St. Joseph's statue in front of my apartment ....

When I was online the other day, I came across a news item about low-income housing being newly built right in my hometown, right in Edison Township, right in the area I'm so familiar with because it's South Edison, my old stomping grounds!!!

And I sighed and knew I wasn't even going to try to find out more about it ... and honestly I don't think I would have thought any further except I got an excited phone call from an old friend who still lives there - Jean, aren't you going to apply for this?!!

And so here is why I'm not -- 

My car insurance goes through the roof, and I'm literally priced out of purchasing cigarettes, if I move back to NJ -- so there are two financial reasons right there, but it's far more than that ;

In the past I've seen similar things and become so excited and so prayerful -- only to be so disappointed, to be crushed emotionally ... and - ya know???  I don't want to go through that again.  Honestly, I think I'm far too fragile.  What's crushed me???  

Again, partially financial :  the oft-told idea of low-income sometimes doesn't even go by what you actually have to live on, but what someone else decides is low-income -- which prices me out of places ... 

It's hearing about a waiting list of a minimum of five years, too ... it's encountering people in administration who don't get it that if it qualifies for senior housing, that also fits people who receive disability - and just. not. having. it. in. me. to. teach. them. what. they. should. already. know.

What I already know, is all that I've written above ... so - no - no St. Joseph's statue ....

There is even a part two or maybe a 1B about this :  right here, where I live now, a friend moved into low-income niiiiice she says housing, and Jean you should apply!  And there it's about the deal with people in administration - I just. don't. want. to. go. through. that. ... and, one more thing: here where I live now, I'm 16 miles one way from a big city - which can be arduous, more so than I realized when I moved here ... well ... this place is another 7 miles on top of that ... and I just don't want to live even further out!

In fact, I'd rather live further in, but .... yeahhh see ^

So here's my question, often asked, not often answered:

AND SO WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME?!!